FF7 Meets Lazytown?
by KadVinClo Inc
Summary: As a result of Kadaj and Vincent's pointless rivalry, they end up in Lazytown. Will they ever be able to get back to Midgar? There's ONLY ONE WAY TO FIND OUT! D


DISCLAIMER: I dont own any of the characters in this fic. Happy? ;D

FF7 Meets Lazytown?

Kadaj sat outside under a tree. Then, Vincent Valentine walked by but payed no mind to the teen who glared at him for no apparent reason whatsoever. Vincent stopped and turned around with an irritable expression on his face.

"Don't look at me" said Vincent.

"I'm not looking at you." said Kadaj. "I was looking at..the.. sun."

"Do you have a problem with my cape?" asked Vincent?

"Yeah I do have a problem with it. Your cape is stupid and ugly and stupid." said Kadaj evily.

Vincent then transformed into a terrifying dragon beast thing and a storm came out of the sky! "AJKAGAKFLOQWDWDJ!" screamed Vincint in his limit-break state. Then he held up his shiny claw and a wind tornado whirled by and blew them all away into the stormy night sky.

-----------------

They woke up in a strange land. As Kadaj got up he noticed he was in a weird town that was very colourful, yet completely deserted. "What the HELL just hapened?" said Kadaj angrily at Vincent who got up and started running back and forth like an idiot.

"Stop that." said Kadaj, but Vincent wouldnt stop running around and so Kadaj had to trip him and Vincent fell down because Kadaj stepped on his cape causing him to fall.

Just then, they were approached by a six-foot tall puppet man.

"Oh, my, good day- you must be new herez!" screamed the puppet-man. His eyes were beady and peirced into the pit of their souls, with a terrifying aura of incompetence yet a tinge of madness. Kadaj screemed and ran away as far as he could. Vincent walked away over to where Kadaj now stood.

"WHERE THE HELL ARE WE?" SCREEMED KADAJ!

"wait let me just check my compass." Vincent took out his compass which was in one of his cape pockets. He studied it for a few momments then said, "according to this, we're in a place called Lazytown."

"Yes" said the puppet man who now was walking towards them. "OH GOD LEAVE ME ALONE!" Kadaj shrieked as he threw himself up against the wall and cowerred in the corner.

"My name is Mayor Meanswell!" said the puppet. "I'm the mayor of this town and I humbly welcome you to our town. You see, there have been some things going on as of late... some unfortunate things..." The mayor turned away from Vincent for a breif momment- casting a shadow over his face and mumbled something innaudible. Then he turned back with a bright friendly expression, whereas Vincent was glaring at him like all "wtf were you just doing".

"Oh, what would we do without our beloved town hero, Sporticus. And of course my... neice... Stephanie? Well. The human with the pink hair." Mayor Meanswell walked over to his house. "Well, bye" he said

There was a long pause.

"Oh thank GOD." Kadaj finally said.

"Well, kid... you're on your own." said Vincent as he began walking away. Kadaj got up and hurriedly followed "HEY you're NOT leaving me here to die in hell !"

Vincint just ignored him and they walked further into town. It was eerie, completely desolate. "o.o; wow who chose the colour scheme..." Kadaj asked, mostly to himself. There were lots of brightly coloured buildings, but no one in sight. But Vincent felt someone was stalking them. He turned around, and much to his sheer horror, a man stood there and made eye contact for 2 seconds- then he leapt behind a bush. Vincent just stood there and waited like only 7 seconds when he saw the head peek out from the bush, and then retreat in an instant again.

"Who the hell are you?" asked Vincent in a monotone voice.

The man walked out from the bush. He was a tall slender, weasel like man. He wore purple and red striped overalls, and his hair was black and gelled back like a weasel.

"I AM RRROBIE RRROTTEN!" He announced to the horrified Kadaj and Vincent.

"What do you want" asked Vincent again.

"I have a proposition for you. For almost a year, Sporticus has been hovering aimlessly in his blimp above Lazytown, foiling all my plans for evil." said Robbie Rotten as he snickered to himself for reasons unknown. "I need your help to destroy Sporticus forever so that Lazytown will remain lazy."

"...wait wait wait..." Kadaj interrupted, "...so your whole 'evil' plan is to make everyone in town stay lazy all day and do nothing but watch tv? What's any of this supposed to accomplish. I don't understand-"

"Incoherent brat!" Robbie Rotten said meanly.

"And isnt that kind of hypocritical, to have a kids tv show teaching kids to go outside and play, rather than watch tv... which they'd have be doing in order to see the show...?"

Vincent shoved aside his silver-haired rival. "If we help you, could you find a way for us to get back to Midgar?" asked Vincent, who was ready to compromise a deal.

Robbie Rotten laughed and did the fairy dance. "sure liek no prob!" Robbie Rotten said in a happy yet disturbing tone of voice.

Robbie Rotten started walking in a direction and told them to follow. Kadaj looked at Vincent skeptically. "I dunno about this, my brothers toldme not to ever ever ever talk to strangers because the might be... what was the word... racists?"

Just tehn they are approached by A man in a blue jumpsuit thing with a blue hat and a whacked out moustache.

"HEY, Sporticus here!" said Sporticus.

"Who the hell are you" asked Vincent.

"I beleive the proper term you were looking for, was 'rapist'!" laughed Sporticus as he flipped around in the air doing summersaults. "Hey I can do that." said Vincent.

"Hey, you're that dude we have to like, kill, in order to go home, right?" said Kadaj?

Sporticus cackled. "YoU ll never be able to catch me"

And Sporticus resumed flipping through the air in place.

"Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm" Vincent wondered. "We must devise a plan to defeat our foe."

Kadaj agreed but Vincent grew hesitant and said "But first you have to apologize to my cape."

"...No." sayd Kadaj.

"fien watev it dosnt matter 2 me i dun rly care." said Vincent. "Anyways.how should we stop him?"

"I dont knowa?" said Kadaj.

"Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm" said Vincent.

Then Mayor Meanswell appears behind them. "Does anybody want to help me bake a cake? We can sing the CAke SonG!"

"AKJDHADQW!111111111111" VINCENT then transformed into a flying dragon monster thingy and created a storm again and a tornado appeard and blew everything away.

-----------------

They woke up back where they started, which was by the tree outside of Midgar.

"wow... was that all just a horrible nightmare?" asked Kadaj as he sat up.

Vincent refrained from standing on his head, and inverted upright. "Yea I think so." said Vincent.

"hay Whos' Going to help me baek a cake?" came the chilling voice of Mayor Meanswell.

Kadaj and Vincent froze, then bolted off in seperate directions screaming.

The legend says, that once every full moon, when saturn is perfectly alligned with pluto- Mayor Meanswell is said to be seen roaming the Midgar badlands and overworld, across the continents throughout the duration of nightfall.

"And that's the story of the most horrible easter ever." said a large stuffed platypus. The children who were gathered around looked up at him with wide eyes filled with wonder.

"Do WE STILL GET EASTER EGGS ?" asked one little child

"No" said the platypus joyously "You get easter plastic."

The End.


End file.
